Heat the olive oil and butter in a large pot over medium heat. Once melted and foamy, add the onions and cook for 3–4 minutes, stirring often.
Add the garlic and cook for 1 minute, stirring frequently.
Carefully add the vodka and cook for 2–3 minutes, stirring frequently, until reduced by at least half.
Stir in the diced tomatoes and tomato sauce. Raise the heat and bring to a boil. Once boiling, lower the heat to medium-low, cover, and simmer for 20–25 minutes, stirring occasionally. Keep the sauce at a simmer, raise or lower the heat as needed.
While the sauce simmers, bring a large pot of water to a boil. Add 1–2 tablespoons of salt. Cook the pasta until just al dente (see package directions). Drain and reserve until ready to use.
Take the sauce off the heat and let it cool slightly. Use an immersion blender to process it until smooth (or use a regular blender, working in batches if needed, see recipe tips and notes #).
Return the pot to low heat. Stir in the half and half, 6 tablespoons of the grated parmesan, and crushed red pepper (if using). Cook gently to warm through, do not let it come to a boil.
Taste and add salt if needed. As a reference, we added a pinch to ours.